12 Pains of Christmas Lyrics

Lyrics to The 12 Pains of Christmas by Bob Rivers*

The first thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me

Is finding a Christmas tree

The second thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

Angry husband:

Rigging up the lights

And finding a Christmas tree

The third thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me

Man getting over being drunk:

Hangovers

Rigging up the lights

And finding a Christmas tree

The fourth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me

Exhausted man:

Sending Christmas cards

Hangovers

Rigging up the lights

And finding a Christmas tree

The fifth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me

Five months of bills!

Sending Christmas cards

Hangovers

Rigging up the lights

And finding a Christmas tree

The sixth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

Nervous wife:

Facing my in-laws

Five months of bills!

Oh, I hate those Christmas cards!

Hangovers

Rigging up these lights!

And finding a Christmas tree

The seventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

Nervous wife's husband:

The Salvation Army

Facing my in-laws

Five months of bills!

Sending Christmas cards

Oh, geez!

I'm tryin' to rig up these lights!

And finding a Christmas tree

The eighth thing at Christmas that such a pain to me:

Whining kid:

I WANNA TRANSFORMER FOR CHRISTMAS!!!!

Charities,

And whataya mean "YOUR in-laws"?!?

Five months of bills!

Oh, making out these cards

Honey, get me a beer, huh?

What, we have no extension cords?!?

And finding a Christmas tree

The ninth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me

A tired father:

Finding parking spaces

DADDY, I WANT SOME CANDY!!!!

Donations!

Facing my in-laws

Five months of bills!

Writing out those Christmas cards

Hangovers!

Now why the hell are they blinking?!?!?

And finding a Christmas tree

The tenth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:

A mother:

"Batteries Not Included"

No parking spaces

BUY ME SOMETHIN'!!!

Get a job, ya bum!

Oh, facing my in-laws!

Five months of bills!

Yo-ho, sending Christmas cards

Oh, geez, look at this!

One light goes out, they ALL go out!!!

And finding a Christmas tree

The eleventh thing of Christmas that's such a pain to me:

A male couch potato:

Stale TV specials

"Batteries Not Included"

No parking spaces

DAD, I GOTTA GO TA BATHROOM!!

Charities!

She's a witch...I hate her!

Five months of bills!

Oh, I don't even KNOW half these people!

Oh, who's got the toilet paper, huh?

Get a flashlight...I blew a fuse!!

And finding a Christmas tree

The twelfth thing of Christmas that's such a pain to me:

Two men:

Singing Christmas carols

Stale TV specials

"Batteries Not Included"

No parking?!?

WAAAAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAAAAH!

Charities!

Gotta make 'em dinner!

Five months of bills!

I'm not sendin' them this year, that's it!

Shut up, you!

FINE! YOU'RE SO SMART, YOU RIG UP THE LIGHTS!!!

And finding a Christmas tree 

*I make no money from this it's strictly for informative purposes. All rights belong to Bob Rivers 

12 Pains of Christmas

Alrightie guys the 12 Pains of Christmas-Booth and Brennan Style is going up tomorrow. It's actually not finished, I just finished Chapter 8 today but that gives me 7 days to finish =). So, grab your Santa hat and let's do this B&B Style!

Holidays Fast Approaching

Okay so Christmas is coming (or whatever holiday you celebrate). I've been thinking of doing another 12 days of Christmas this year. It would be a continuation of the one I did last year. What do you guys think? I have to finish by the 12th at the latest. I asked my beta but I'd like your input as well. She'll probably say yes anyway lol. Let me know!

More Delays

I've been working slowly but steadily and I thank you guys for your awesome support and patience. I think I've found a way to get my muse into action so things should be moving along. But before that happens I may be taking a small break (a month or so). I found out on Monday that my grandfather died. It was sudden unexpected and hit my like a train. I will see what happens but I just thought you should know that everything is being pushed back more =(. I may end up throwing myself into my writing and it may work for you, or I may go find a hole to crawl into until I can pretend this never happened.

An itty-bitty, bitty, preview.

Not much guys. sorry but I feel like I'm giving more than half the story away so I've cut back on the previews. Maybe another few chapters I'll throw another one up =). For now a sneak peek for you. (As always non-betaed<is that even a word?> and all the errors are all me).

Getting up, Price walked over to the tray with the pieces of metal on them. Seeing the one that Cam had rubbed the flesh off of, he leaned closer. Standing up abruptly, he reached over, pulled out two gloves then put them on. 

Cam turned around in surprise when she heard him put the gloves on. She saw him holding the medal in his hands and rubbing the blood off. He let out a low whistle and peered closer.

“This is a Valorous Unit Award,” he said almost in a reverent whisper. 

Setting it down he began picking up pieces of metal, rubbing them off then setting them down in a row.

“Aww, hell,” he muttered, glaring at the medals laying on the tray.

“Is there a problem, Agent Price?” Hodgins asked, walking over to stand near him.

“Other than we have someone with a long military career that has served in every military conflict since the early nineties except the War on Terror and was a P.O.W, no there’s not a problem,” Price said, letting out a sigh.

I'm starting to wonder....

Ash:Yo. Do you mind?
 
CAN YOU PLEASE CREATE THE NEW SEQUEL ALREADY?!
 
This is THE longest you went on WITHOUT cresting new sequel to the Bones
series.
 
It's going to be a year in less than a month.
 
So do you mind?! GRT OFF OF YOUR BUTT AND POST THE SEQUEL ALREADY!
 
Geeesh!
 
THANK YOU!
Ashley N

I'm trying I really am but my life is hectic more so than when I started this series.

And now I'm thinking I may just throw up an I'm freaking sorry but this is the end of these series. 

I should never have posted anything =( 

I was getting some very nice reviews from someone who had never reviewed before. 

They are going back and reviewing! I love it and it has done unbelievable things for my muse.

Then it all comes crashing down with one review to which I can't respond =( 

Update

Alright ladies and gents. Are there even any gents reading this? Meh, whatever, I wanted to let you know I just finished another chapter and am about half way through another. These chapters were hard to come up with, harder yet to type then there's still revisions yet to do. I almost feel mean for doing this to my readers but as ya'll know I like to keep some stuff real. My muse has decided to come back and *looks around furtively* I've been ignoring house work to let her run free. Shame on me but not really *grin* I just wanted to let you  know I'm not dead and that when you get to this chapter you are soooo going to hate me.

No they're not breaking up...sheesh

No neither one of them are dying....sheesh *rolls eyes*

No they don't lose the baby...sheesh....

*smirk*

Reviews

Here in the last few days or weeks I've gotten a few reviews for Espionage. Yes, I know it's been a year and yes I understand you guys are antsy. I really do appreciate your patience but I must tell you the life has been hectic and full of pain. I spent two months is physical therapy. Days when I wasn't in therapy, I was vomiting from pain. You know you want to write while you're in that much pain, right? Let's not forget holidays, taking of my son who has special needs (it can take up to three hours to get his meds into him), dealing with his doctors appointments and mine. If you have a chronic illness you know this isn't a once a year thing. This is two or three times a month thing now multiply that by two.

I really do appreciate my readers, I love you guys to death and I'm not trying to be mean but doing the guilt thing only pisses me off. I'm glad you like my story but ticking me off or using guilt or any other type of manipulation even if unintentional has negative kick backs. I dig in my heels, glare at the screen then go and crochet. I'm working as hard and as fast as I can. The story is an emotional roller coaster and some parts were written in Second Comes Marriage and not in Hunted first. So I know it's coming and I really don't want it too. No, I'm not telling you what it is =P. But there is a lot going on in the story. I'm hoping that once I get past this point that it will come much faster *crosses fingers*

So, to those who patiently wait, thank you.
To those who aren't well sucks to be ya'll cos you can't make me work any faster.......

Sorry if it sounds mean but hey I'm not necessarily always nice as you've seen before.

A New Unit Member

Oh me oh my what do we have here? A non dead me to start with but then another sneak peek...just so you know I'm still going at it. I'm almost to the point where it splits and I go wild without worrying about where this or that person is woohooo!! I know it's been a very long wait and I appreciate you all waiting so patiently. I hope it's worth the wait.

Booth heard weird growling and hissing noise from his left. Jerking his head around he almost yelled in surprise when he saw what Goodman was holding.

“What the hell is that?” He asked, his voice an octave higher than normal.

Goodman chuckled and reached into his pocket. Breaking off a piece of snack bread from his rations he held it out to the growling animal in his hands.

“It's a long eared hedgehog. He started visiting us while we were waiting. So, I started feeding it whenever he came over. He decided to come home with us,” Goodman said, with a grin.

“Those things are rats, they could carry the bubonic plague,” Booth said, grimacing. Goodman burst into laughter and shook his head.

“They're just as likely to carry an infectious disease as any other wild animal. Not all of them carry diseases, Sarge. As long as I wash my hands it shouldn't be a problem and they're not rats,” he said, letting the animal roll up in his palm.

“Yeah, well he's sleeping with you,” Perkins said, glaring at the little animal.

I'm not dead. Had to take the old fashion route and am hand writing. ;)

Just thought ya'll should know